By
Daniel Claar
What possesses an otherwise sane
individual to remove their clothes in the middle of a freezing
mountain wilderness? Good question. I can think of two scenarios
and the end results are radically different. The tallest ice
covered peaks in the world are littered with half-dressed and
frozen corpses of unlucky or unprepared mountaineers. In what
might be the brain's last ditch effort to end its own suffering,
one of the final symptoms of extreme hypothermia is a burning
sensation. In the coldest conditions imaginable, delirious
people become convinced they are overheating. As the clothes
come off, death comes mercifully quick - at least compared to
the alternative.
The other situation might require you to
freeze for a minute, but the rest of the experience is worth any
momentary discomfort. I have crossed icy rivers with bare legs
aching so bad I wanted to scream and all of it done to reach one
singular, glorious destination. All across this great planet,
super-heated water within the earth's crust is forced to the
surface, forming hot streams and pools in which people can soak;
a pastime our species has enjoyed for thousands of years.
Actually, human beings are not entirely alone as those red-faced
Macaques in Japan embrace the hobby as well. And who can blame
them? Hot springs are Earth’s natural Jacuzzi’s and everyone
should experience one of the great pools. Those who do locate a
prime soaker also find any excuse to return for another dip.
Soaking in hot springs is positively habit forming. Trust me;
I’m a full blown junkie.
Yellowstone National Park is the world's
most recognizable location for such geothermal activity, but
even if the park’s pools were accessible, a dip in those waters
would leave a person feeling forever empathetic towards
lobsters. The trick with hot springs, much like Goldilocks’
porridge dilemma, is finding a pool that is just right.
There are other factors to consider. A
crystal clear pool with the perfect temperature can still be
infested with red spider mites, flat worms, or in rare
instances, even brain amoebas. Algae build up and the sulphuric
reek of some water is a consideration and the chemical content
of every hot spring is different. I have been driven off by the
rotten-egg funk at some locations and soaked in pools so rich in
lithium they can sedate a mini-van full of spastic children
faster than an ether soaked rag. I suppose there is also a
chance the plate-tectonics suddenly shift, unleashing a flood of
boiling water, or even molten lava into the hot spring. Alright,
outside of Hollywood, that last one never happens. Ultimately,
sitting in geothermal pools requires a small leap of faith, but
for the most part, the water in your friend's hot tub is a lot
more frightening.
Potential risks aside, there is no
sensation like immersing yourself in a hot pool while surrounded
by pristine, snow covered wilderness and letting your mind and
body relax. All your tension, all your aches, your cares, that
mounting pile in your in-box, the traffic, the noise, the bills
and bottom lines, all of it just melts away. Of course, you can
unwind in a hot spring at any time; I just prefer taking a
plunge when the weather is cold.
I am also spoiled because Idaho has more
pools fit for soaking than all of our neighboring states
combined. There are well over 100 frequently visited public hot
springs in the Gem State and I have ventured to well over half
of them. In fact, I proposed to my wife at a perfect pool
somewhere on the narrow, windy road to one of Central Idaho’s
most isolated towns. Once, while soaking there, a golden eagle
floated overhead as we sat dumbstruck watching the magnificent
raptor work its way up river. Another time, as twilight was
blurring into actual darkness, we noticed a large shadowy form
and flashing pair of eyes from a nearby rocky outcrop. It could
have been our imagination, or some illusion in the billowing
steam, but we both saw it and choose to believe it was a
mountain lion blessing our soak.
Oh, and nothing personal, but I rarely
mention hot springs by name or describe how to find them.
Planning trips and locating them is part of the obsession.
Besides, there are plenty of resources readily available on the
subject. The sad truth is - there are way too many abused hot
springs in Idaho for me to feel responsible about providing
specific directions. Unfortunately, this leads me to the
greatest threat you are likely to encounter in your soaking
adventures.
There is a creature living amongst us, a
creature so ugly and vile, I am reluctant to speak its name.
This disrespectful beast has zero consideration for the planet
and even less for those of us sharing it. Hot springs are
frequently ambushed by these monsters and left in such a state
of filth one might believe a landfill had started. Broken
bottles, aluminum cans, dirty underwear, cigarette butts,
condoms, diapers, tampons, and every other piece of trash you
can possibly imagine is left in their wake. So intent on
spreading waste, they do not mind if a location is ruined for
their own possible return. I cannot figure out from what foul
stench they might have spawned, but their ignorance and
self-loathing is inflicted on everything in their path. I call
this abomination, which bears a striking resemblance to ordinary
humans, a "Jackhole." Unpleasant, I know, but what good is a
writing degree if I can’t invent my own neologisms?
More and more frequently, pools all over
the northwest are being shutdown, torn apart, or otherwise
access denied because of these jackholes. Their calling card is
the late night drunken raid which ends with an overabundance of
scattered refuse, vandalism, human waste, and sometimes, even
violence. More than one person has lost their life, or been
hospitalized, from what should have been a simple and relaxing
trip to an Idaho hot spring. Idiocy and alcohol, always a
dangerous combination.
In order to avoid jackholes, my wife and I
precisely time our hot spring visits, and we always take trash
bags. We clean up after ourselves and almost always have to
clean some jackhole’s mess as well. For the record, I do not
take pleasure in picking up the trash of others. However, I
cannot enjoy myself while wallowing in filth either. I will
never understand how anyone could purposely trash our forests,
mountains, campgrounds, and these natural hot springs which
Native Americans long considered sacred. They managed to utilize
these pools without destroying them for thousands of years. What
happened?
Anyone fortunate enough to have soaked in
Rocky Canyon hot spring, prior to its destruction in the fall of
2009, can tell you firsthand about the heartache caused by
jackholes. In this case, even their perceived presence prompted
the Forest Service to bust out sledgehammers and destroy a work
of art and ingenuity. Rocky Canyon was amongst the very best
public hot springs in Idaho, mostly due to the sheer number of
brilliantly constructed pools. Technically, it was illegally
built, meaning someone took the time to mortar in rock walls and
plumbing. As Idaho hot springs are still considered sacred land
to Native Americans, making permanent improvements is officially
frowned upon. That being said, there are dozens of mortared
pools throughout the state not garnering anyone’s attention and
we should strive to keep it that way.
Forest Service employees watched the
builder of Rocky Canyon work on the project for a couple of
years, which leads me to believe it wasn’t the improvements at
the heart of the issue. They focused on the legality angle when
discussing the matter with the press and those who fought to
preserve it, but if that was the case, why not shut down
construction from the very beginning? Behind the scenes, Forest
Service employees referred to the hot spring as an "attractant"
and that was the reason it had to be destroyed. Bet you can’t
guess what they were worried about attracting?
I will not suggest Rocky Canyon was free
from jackholes, as I doubt any such haven exists, but the pools
were built in such an aesthetically pleasing manner, people
seemed reluctant to abuse the area. In addition, several
individuals took it upon themselves to clean the hot springs on
a regular basis. There was a sense of camaraderie and respect
missing from the vast majority of Idaho pools. Rocky Canyon was
the best maintained public hot spring I had encountered and that
was only after improvements had been made.
Prior to the construction, the area had
been a stronghold for jackholes. Mountains of trash were
routinely left behind and pools were built using unsightly
plastic tarps that were left at the river’s edge to build up
algae harmful to fish and rot slowly. However, thanks to the
hard work of one man, and those who sought to preserve his
efforts, Rocky Canyon became one of Idaho’s most precious gems.
Regrettably, it did not last long; the pools were too visible,
too utilized, and the people in charge assumed
it was attracting too many jackholes.
There are many hot springs throughout Idaho facing a similar
fate as Rocky Canyon. Many of the pools are already legitimate
attractants for an endless supply of jackholes and in such a
state of abuse, I understand why someone might want them
removed. As such, we have to take it upon ourselves to clean and
care for these wonders of nature. We have to be even more
zealous about preservation and protection than the jackholes are
dedicated to destruction and disrespect. No easy task, but
certainly manageable if we all pitch in.
Hot spring care is not rocket science;
there are just a few items to keep in mind. First and foremost,
as it is with any outdoor activity, always practice the leave no
trace principals. If trash is brought in, it can easily be
bagged up and packed back out. I am a born and raised Idahoan
and my parents taught me to leave recreation sites in better
condition than I found them. Imagine if everyone treated our
public lands with similar respect.
In addition to taking care of trash, there
are certain items that should never be brought in the first
place. This seems like common sense, but based on ample findings
over the years, it cannot be repeated enough. Do not bring glass
to hot springs. I am well aware of the fact wine, liquor, and
great beer comes in bottles. As a beer snob, I too, am forced to
make sacrifices. However, anything originally packaged in glass
can easily be poured into a portable, plastic container. We
might have to sacrifice on presentation, but this way nobody’s
child, mother, or family pet risks a serious laceration and
possible infection.
If we clean up after ourselves and avoid
bringing glass, the only item left is the care of the pool
itself. I bring a 5 gallon bucket and long handled bristle
brush. Often times, the pool is ready for soaking, but if I do
need to clean one, at least I have the tools. A thorough scrub
down of the algae covered walls followed by a draining of the
pool will be enough to clean most hot springs. Sometimes the
process might need repeated, but remember, never use cleaning
chemicals, or soap of any kind.
The five gallon bucket comes in handy if
you need to rinse the walls or adjust the temperature by porting
loads from another water source. I also use mine to carry out
trash. For the most part, the geothermal water takes care of
itself, but we take the time to care for the actual pools and
their surroundings.
In addition to maintenance, I want to
touch upon the general principles of hot spring etiquette and
hopefully we can reach some kind of accord. I base these
policies on thousands of man hours soaking and very little else.
For example, what should you do when arriving at a hot spring
and there is already someone soaking in the pool? For
starters, do not pull up a perch, or
circle the area like a pack of wolves. Instead, just wait
patiently for your turn, or try to find another soaker. Where
there is one hot spring, there is often times another nearby.
Now, if the pool is large enough to
accommodate multiple parties, it is absolutely permissible to
approach and ask to join. Bear in mind, there is nothing worse
than having a relaxing soak interrupted by obnoxious people who
assume everyone enjoys their boisterous company. You take your
chances when intruding on another’s soak. Most hot-springers are
cordial towards strangers and generous with their personal
space. I, on the other hand, am a paranoid, pistol packing
whacko who doesn’t like anyone coming within 100 feet. You just
never know…
My surliness aside, and in the spirit of
generosity, hot spring etiquette also suggests you should not
hog a pool unto thine own self, especially when you know others
are patiently waiting. We should reward those who wait their
turn by spending a reasonable amount of time in the water and
not treating it like a camp site. In other words, share just
like our kindergarten teachers taught us.
So, clean up after yourselves, do not
bring glass, take care of the hot springs, and be tactful and
generous towards your fellow soakers. That pretty much
encompasses hot spring care and etiquette with the exception of
one large, naked elephant sitting in the middle of the room. Or,
in the pool, as the case may be. Should you wear a swimsuit, or
is it ok to enjoy a natural hot spring au’ naturale?
I have long joked that if nobody really
wants to see you naked, then it is perfectly acceptable to be
naked at hot springs. It is easy enough to avert the eyes from a
sight you do not wish to behold. Some people, mostly large men,
even try to utilize brazen nudity as a tool to keep the more
prudish population at bay; a technique that works surprisingly
well.
On the other hand, how do you refrain from
looking at someone you do find attractive, especially when they
are naked? Some primitive aspect of human evolution probably
dictates that we sneak a peek; however, we can keep ourselves
from gawking or making comments. If I caught someone blatantly
staring at my wife and showing no tact whatsoever, I’d probably
stab them in the eyes. Again, that’s just me. You decide for
yourself at what point a stabbing seems appropriate.
Ultimately, you have to determine how
comfortable you are being naked in public or seeing other people
nude. Many hot-springers subscribe to the idea all human bodies
are beautiful regardless of shape, size, and percentage of body
hair coverage. I think that is a wonderful and enlightened
philosophy, I’m just not convinced it’s true.
If nudity is a concern, you will want to
familiarize yourself with different hot springs. At certain
pools, you are almost guaranteed to see naked bodies, while at
others, it is fairly uncommon. Typically, the more isolated and
harder to reach, the more commonplace skinny dipping becomes.
I tend to wear a swimsuit during the day
and at heavily trafficked hot springs. Experience has taught me
how common interruptions are, and frankly, I have no craving to
be naked around someone’s grandparents and appreciate the same
consideration in return. Then again, maybe that grandma would
like to see a young buck like myself naked. Who knows? See what
I mean? It just gets a little awkward.
Speaking of weird, you also never know
what critters might inhabit the pool and in my opinion the less
exposed entry points, the better. I’ve witnessed a few scary
worm-like creatures, about a billion spiders, and once saw a guy
get stung by a wasp on an exposed testicle. That memory, in
particular, probably influences my swimwear decisions more than
I care to admit. It really looked uncomfortable at the time. I
even felt bad for laughing.
Swimsuit or birthday suit, it really
doesn’t matter, the geothermal water is the important thing. The
hot, healing, therapeutic, calming liquid is what the experience
is all about and Idahoans should celebrate this natural
phenomenon. These pools are all around us and we can ensure they
remain available for public use. Tragically, I am reluctant to
share my joy of hot springs because I fear advertising will
attract the wrong people. This is my experience with our
wilderness, cemented and reinforced after cleaning up countless
acts of vandalism and environmental disrespect.
If jackholes continue to trash these
precious gifts, they will all go the course of Rocky Canyon and
once again, the bad guys will have triumphed over decency. If
you love soaking in miraculous pools in some of the most
beautiful country on earth, or even if you love the idea, get
out there and do it! Enjoy yourself, but please take care of the
land, the hot springs, the wildlife, and each other. We can make
it work. These pools can still exist for our children and their
children, especially if we teach them the way my mother taught
me. Clean up the mess others leave behind, but even better,
spread the word of ecological responsibility. These are our
public lands and we should not tolerate anyone destroying them.
The vast wilderness of Idaho and its numerous hot springs are a
treasure, a birthright, let’s keep it that way forever.
Happy soaking!
